Things You May Have Not Known About Me
1. 6.8 percent of my body mass is made up of gravy
2. I am the Skipper AND Mary Ann.
3. The state of South Carolina was named after me. But due to a technicality, the renaming was withdrawn.
4. Ernest Hemingway once said this about me: "If he was a lion, I would have chased that son of a bitch down to Cuba. In any case, his use of the word "dude" expresses both sympathy and pity. But his charisma, is like a lightning bolt through heaven, where only God ponders it's meaning."
5. I don't understand a fucking word what Ernest Hemingway says.
6. I make it a practice of, after leaving a town, of killing everyone. It's a kind of obsessive compulsive thing - if you watch 'Monk', you would understand.
7. At my workplace, I am known as "Brad The Omniprescent Pisser".
8. Every time my wife turns the remote controller, a little part of me dies.
9. I am a two time champion in Greco-Roman wrestling. My secret? I use a rifle.
10. When I sleep, Canada is my pillow, the United States is my blanket, and Mexico sucks my toes.
11. I created a canopy made of rayon that would shield me from harmful sarcastic remarks. The problem? It dissolved compassion or my fellow humans.
12. Ben has first dibs on my kidney.
13. Between 1995 & 1998 - I was dead. Don't believe me? Ask around!
14. I taught everything Tiger Woods knows... in love!
15. I do not acknowledge the existence of the number fifteen.
16. I dream of sea monkeys. It is a curse.
2. I am the Skipper AND Mary Ann.
3. The state of South Carolina was named after me. But due to a technicality, the renaming was withdrawn.
4. Ernest Hemingway once said this about me: "If he was a lion, I would have chased that son of a bitch down to Cuba. In any case, his use of the word "dude" expresses both sympathy and pity. But his charisma, is like a lightning bolt through heaven, where only God ponders it's meaning."
5. I don't understand a fucking word what Ernest Hemingway says.
6. I make it a practice of, after leaving a town, of killing everyone. It's a kind of obsessive compulsive thing - if you watch 'Monk', you would understand.
7. At my workplace, I am known as "Brad The Omniprescent Pisser".
8. Every time my wife turns the remote controller, a little part of me dies.
9. I am a two time champion in Greco-Roman wrestling. My secret? I use a rifle.
10. When I sleep, Canada is my pillow, the United States is my blanket, and Mexico sucks my toes.
11. I created a canopy made of rayon that would shield me from harmful sarcastic remarks. The problem? It dissolved compassion or my fellow humans.
12. Ben has first dibs on my kidney.
13. Between 1995 & 1998 - I was dead. Don't believe me? Ask around!
14. I taught everything Tiger Woods knows... in love!
15. I do not acknowledge the existence of the number fifteen.
16. I dream of sea monkeys. It is a curse.
2 Comments:
95-98...hmmmm, I don't think you missed much in that period of time. I hope being dead was nice and restful! ;)
By Tiff, at 15/9/04 7:37 AM
From what I remember, I was very embarressed when I was outside walking in 1998 in torn jeans & flannel. The doctor failed to notify me that grunge was dead.
By Brad, at 15/9/04 10:14 AM
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