Grumpy me.
Here's a riddle.
Q= What's pink and brown and pink and brown and attracts dark clouds?
A= The 100-year Spot.
I have been spotting and cramping for what feels like 100 years (although it is actually just a week) and still no period. Today, the cramping is accelerated. I am sure the red tide is just around the corner. At least it had the good grace to hold off until the weekend when I can properly dope my ass up. Today, however, it's making my mood very grey.
Adding to this day of hell are little piddly irritants that when combined with that sour ambrosia of hell, otherwise known as Estrogen, create a very grumpy ME.
Piddly Irritants
I'm back on Glucophage. Therefore, no more sugar. No more Potato Marathon Snarfing ("PMS"). More of what I don't want: meat. Soy has too damn many carbs and makes the Glucophage angry.
It's cold. I hate cold. I hate wearing layers of clothes. They get wadded, they make it hard to move your arms, hard to turn your head, make your bra straps fall down and they make your waistline look thrice its actual size.
I have never been to Europe. My mother is taking my teenage cousin to London this summer and I am so jealous I could cry.
My office looks like a toxic waste dump and because I am not the only one in here, I have zero control over how it looks.
My jeans are tight. And therefore, they are very, very stupid.
I just ran out of Evian. No other water will suffice. When Cachat Springs runs dry, so will I.
Woe is me, huh? I must be the most pitiful person on the planet. At least in my head I am. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go cry myself a freaking river.
--------------
Instead of crying a river, I took my self-pity to Target. I figured I'd buy myself a new HEPA filter for my office purifier (clean air can't hurt, right?) and some pretty things for myself. It was a wonderful experience. Target has this limited line of stuff, imported from all over the world. Lots of dark woods and rich colors. Like Pier One when everything is reasonably priced. Only available through Feb 18, though. I got a few things for the bathroom.
It helped.
Damn. Broken or not, I guess I AM a woman, after all.
Q= What's pink and brown and pink and brown and attracts dark clouds?
A= The 100-year Spot.
I have been spotting and cramping for what feels like 100 years (although it is actually just a week) and still no period. Today, the cramping is accelerated. I am sure the red tide is just around the corner. At least it had the good grace to hold off until the weekend when I can properly dope my ass up. Today, however, it's making my mood very grey.
Adding to this day of hell are little piddly irritants that when combined with that sour ambrosia of hell, otherwise known as Estrogen, create a very grumpy ME.
Piddly Irritants
I'm back on Glucophage. Therefore, no more sugar. No more Potato Marathon Snarfing ("PMS"). More of what I don't want: meat. Soy has too damn many carbs and makes the Glucophage angry.
It's cold. I hate cold. I hate wearing layers of clothes. They get wadded, they make it hard to move your arms, hard to turn your head, make your bra straps fall down and they make your waistline look thrice its actual size.
I have never been to Europe. My mother is taking my teenage cousin to London this summer and I am so jealous I could cry.
My office looks like a toxic waste dump and because I am not the only one in here, I have zero control over how it looks.
My jeans are tight. And therefore, they are very, very stupid.
I just ran out of Evian. No other water will suffice. When Cachat Springs runs dry, so will I.
Woe is me, huh? I must be the most pitiful person on the planet. At least in my head I am. Now if you'll excuse me, I'm going to go cry myself a freaking river.
--------------
Instead of crying a river, I took my self-pity to Target. I figured I'd buy myself a new HEPA filter for my office purifier (clean air can't hurt, right?) and some pretty things for myself. It was a wonderful experience. Target has this limited line of stuff, imported from all over the world. Lots of dark woods and rich colors. Like Pier One when everything is reasonably priced. Only available through Feb 18, though. I got a few things for the bathroom.
It helped.
Damn. Broken or not, I guess I AM a woman, after all.
5 Comments:
Ooo, I got sucked into that section yesterday at Target and was really impressed with it. I spent 20 minutes just in one aisle touching everything. (I'm so very tactile)
Ollie,
Had I know you had this 100 connection, I would have invited you to the school where I subbed today. It was 100 day! Nothing like a slew of first graders running around hopped up on 100 pieces of candy.
Buying stuff always makes me feel better, too. Hope your day has improved or will soon improve.
Cramping and spotting sucks. Meat sucks. Winter sucks. Messy offices suck. Tight jeans suck. Suck big donkey balls. Sorry. I'm glad you did some retail therapy.
*going to go drink my remaining bottles of wine, champagne and beer..just for YOU.*
I hope you feel better hon, and have a better than expected weekend! ((HUGS))
FYI on the glucophage: not all pills have the same stomach side effects. I found this out by accident when I switched brands. I had a lot of "problems" taking them when I started out. When I got a refill (many months later) with a different looking pill, I realized that I hadn't had the horrible side effects that I had grown to expect. I was suffering terribly for no reason. The new pills (still generic but different manufacturer) were way easier on my stomach. I don't know if it is the same for everyone, but I figured I share it for what it is worth. The pills I hated were round and the ones I liked were oblong/oval shaped. Good Luck!! Lisa (Michigan Lisa)
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