Unexpected Treats and Medicine Cabinet Treasures

Today sucked, menstrually speaking. I felt that my cervix was being ripped apart and the neat thing is that it was being done 100% speculum-free! Hooray, my body has learned to dilate the cervix on its own, a Gynecologist's dream come true. I imagine it even makes the same sound that doors on the U.S.S. Enterprise make on Star Trek.

*pshhhhhht*

But I digress.

I returned home after driving for forty minutes of blissful Volkswagen seat-heating (oh the glory of that car feature). Brad and I were welcomed by an innocent-looking cardboard box at our door. I LOVE mail, especially the kind that comes in boxes. I'd be the bonehead that opened up the box of anthrax because I LOVE mail in boxes. It's titillating.

So we brought the box in and examined the outside. From Fiji's. Ooooh, candy.

Sure enough, smaller boxes of delectible chocolates filled the inside of the bigger box. OH RAPTURE! Not only did I get MAIL in a BOX, but it had SMALLER BOXES of CHOCOLATE!!! If my uterus wasn't threatening to fall out of my body, I'd have done the happy banana dance.

The mystery set in. No card. Nothing. I have NO IDEA who the Chocolate Saint was. Someone sent us this spectacular box of joy and then didn't take credit for the act. Random acts of kindness indeed. I will be enjoying the fruit of their altruistic act for .. oh who am I fooling, it will be a few days and the chocolate will be *poof*.

I chased a pecan caramel truffle with a muscle relaxer whose name I cannot pronounce and now I feel mighty nice. I don't even give a crap if my reproductive organs are having a full-on Civil War.

Thank you, whomever you may be, oh mighty Chocolate Benefactor.

*pshhhhhht*